I was thinking today, and I wanted to ask:
Is it a net-negative trait to have a strong conscience and desire to do what is right?
It seems that since Christ loves us no matter what, it would be a net-negative experience overall to care about the well-being of others to a great degree. That it would be a net-negative trait to put others first above oneself. I ask because this has come up in my own life.
I don’t like to buy art (or videogames, back when I would play videogames) for myself. I am reminded of the pain of others, and I cannot be helping others when I get those things for myself. I get the whole “by buying those things you still help the people who make the stuff” but other people will do that anyway. I sometimes find myself feeling resentment towards those who do not care about others in that way and get stuff for themselves anyway. Like I wish I cared as little as they tell me they themselves care.
Additionally, I am Naive to explict adult experiences and I sometimes regret not wanting to be more adventurous in that way, despite the clear prohibition against it. Plenty of other people do those things (and much worse) and do get joy from it. Then they seek forgiveness from God, get it, and may or may not ever care enough to seek forgiveness from others or even stop doing the thing. But they don’t really need to?
I am very confused.